Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Farmville is her only friend.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize