Cold hands, warm shart.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
