I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
