Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
