Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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