In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
