I didn't shave. On purpose
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
