at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
