The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
