Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
