I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
