Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
