Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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