OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
and eventually we just all took our pants off
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
