I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We don't watch enough power rangers
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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