you guys were way drunker than both of me
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
We need to rekindle our bromance
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
