In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
