Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
me + whiskey = a bad person
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
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