yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he fucked my hip out of place.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize