Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
