Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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