why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize