Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
