she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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