So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
