She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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