so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
