the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
