The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I think your dad took our porno
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
