At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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