Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
