as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
