Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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