If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
