we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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