If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
