also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
