I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
