im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
