R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
