Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize
