My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Randomize
