I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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