return my video game
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Dick very happy bro
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
