Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
