Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
