Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
