just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
