is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
