and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
